I have written

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I have written you a poem
No, it’s not about the first time we met
No, it’s not the first time you made my heart skip a beat
No, it’s not about our moments together
But rather about how stupid I was for thinking you feel the same

I once heard that
Falling in love wasn’t the stupidest thing you could do
It was thinking that he or she felt the same way about you
It led me thinking of how my one single sentiment
Can etch my heart, my brain, my soul of your name

It still hurts to hear you
Say her name with a deafening smile
That smile used to send me warmth
But only when it used to be my name
Here I am again-assuming

I was thinking of you
Yet during those times she was in your mind
I do not want to intrude your personal thoughts
So I offered you my eerie silence
I hid my bare heart from you

After all, you were not to meant to stay
I thought I could have you for a long time
But you’re as free as the air
One minute, you are here
The second, you are gone

I have written this to tell you
That you have captured me and all
And though you cannot give me back the feelings I gave you
I would still rather be alone
Than to not have you with me at all

To the guy who’s never gonna reciprocate the love I have for

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Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh 1-pink-rose-robert-thomaston.jpg

I swear I was destined to be wrong again

My heart kept beating loudly as a car’s siren

I was gasping for air, I couldn’t breathe

A numb sensation covered me but there were gnashing teeth

I fell, and everything that falls break

As soon as I loved you, the world’s at stake

You changed everything, you deliberately forced it to happen

Nights are grown,days are shorten

I knew for sure what I felt was real

But you struck me in my chest, took my heart out

Squeezed all the blood from it and placed it back

Maybe I’m still breathing but you killed me

You didn’t do it once, you did it everyday when I wake up

I continually sensed the pain

I abstained your action cause I love you

Even when you don’t love me  back

Now that we’re off to our own lives

You can easily throw me away like a speck of dust on your shoulder

While I continue to wail about my feelings

Yet one question kept me up all night

Do you love me too?

Just imagine the regret if you did so too.

Barely

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My heart hurts

I know, so does yours

Thing is, you probably felt it before and this is the first time mine did

Periods when I can’t think straight

Periods when I don’t want to do a thing

I barely even make an effort on writing this


My brain hurts

I know, cause it’s who and what I am

Truth is, my thoughts are stabbing me and in this memory I fall and fall hopelessly

Moments when I can’t say a word

Moments when life could drag me around

I barely even rise from my bed


My eyes hurt

I know, it’s you who I see, no one else

It is, and I can’t seem to denote how to get you out

Visions of the first time I saw you

Visions of the day I just ruptured

I barely even see the light


My stomach hurts

I know,  my creatures can’t find any pollen

Fear is, losing something that was never yours but you thought it was, drip of thought

That feeling you get when you know you’re going to fall and you kept waiting for the impact

That feeling you get when a someone asks you out but then was just tripping with friends

I barely even eat since you decided to leave


All my organs hurt

I know, you know, both of us know, you did it; a criminal, a traitor, a swine

Hatred is, I hate myself, hate myself that I could never stop loving you

I assumed that you’ll come back and be here but I could hope forever, just hope

I assumed that time would heal my broken organs, organs that were meant for you to break, but it didn’t

I barely even, barely even at at all